i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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