all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
