no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
