dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
