Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
