i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
What happened to fro yo and sex?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
