I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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