It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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