This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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