the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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