I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
