Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
He had one of those small greek statue penises
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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