I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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