my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Randomize
