Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
There r osticjed everywhere
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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