Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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