And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
