do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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