My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
