I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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