I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
You took a bar mat shot.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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