I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
