Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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