I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
What a fucking waste of an outfit
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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