it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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