he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
