it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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