i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
