1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
How naked do you want me to be?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
