Your face is a jimmy john
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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