She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
