how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
you would pick up someone in the library
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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