it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
