I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
