then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
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