Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Randomize
