she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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