Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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