I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
