now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
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