he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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