Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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