just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
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