oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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