guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
They have beer where we have blood.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
