Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
