Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
