Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
