Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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