went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
